Summer fun 2020

 So, turns out Dovedale was just a very small trailer of things to come.  The next day was tiny A’s  2nd birthday party (which turned out a bit political but hey ho!), R enjoyed a lot playing with little A.

During the week, time was spent doing Kumon, watching tele, chatting with friends, Schoefirld and Sims an d a little bit of singing theory and practice with some piano thrown in. Apart from April to June when I was on furlough, both K and I have been crazy busy with no time for the young one.

The next week end , Friday started with Burmese food and then we went to our nearby mall, had hot chocolate and generally relaxed as evenings were spent in the park with friends by K and R while I caught up on my Korean drama fix.

The next weekend was a girls sleep over at ours post a whole  day’s play at one of theirs. Another day was spent at Coventry park, getting to know three other families, the ladies of whom got quite close by the end of summer.

31st was spent in Varalakshmi Pooja dress up, devotional songs and fun at the end of it all in H, the P and finally at N,s home with sumptuous food at all 3. 

The next weekend just the 3 of us went to London to thank the Gods and have lunch and dinner at Saraavana bhavan, East Ham. A beautiful sunny day was spent at Thames Barrier park as well.

The next week we went to Padley Gorge with our new friends. The girls had a blast getting from one end of the stream to another. A lovely picnic was enjoyed as well.. All in all a truly wonderful day was spent.

Every other day, our neighbouring kid N would come over or R would go over and have water fun, trampoline fun etc. on top of it, N’s neighbour had 3 friendly dogs, so R had great fun with them.

On the Friday I had all the ladies over for a sleep over. Needless to say, lots of gossip, yummy food, anthakshari etc happened and we slept only between 5pm and 7 pm..and we chatted agin till 11am before everyone making their way home. Young N’s homemade Sangria was a big hit.

On the morning of Ganesh Pooja the week after, we went on the umberslade Trail as a family and the after that I went o Eldon park with my colleague R. The day was beautiful and the trails were a delight. Late evening was spent at S’s house, gorging on yummy food on top of what was consumed at the newly opened SkV  P. N had sent in some delicacies as well..

For the young one’s birthday the3families went to the water world on stoke on Trent, had a mega great time, came home dressed up and had a simple cake and crisps party with N, our lovely American neighbour, little D, and NYTL family and Y’mum as well on top of the usual 3culprits. On the way to the water park, we also visited N’s house to give them cake and for the young one to take her blessings.

She received her usual gift from her R mama and the usual gift from R, B and A, our friends in Blore. C,K and R sent their wishes as well.

Post the party I made it a point to visit P’s home and N’s home just to give sweets.

The next day was N’s daughter L’s birthday, as well as H’s birthday. So we went to the party, ate, danced, enjoyed and then made it to H’s home for cake, gupshup and more fun. Came home with R at 2 pm!K was really worried!

Next day we packed and went on our way to Wales, K, T and I working through our drive. S had cooked sumptuous food and (H had brought hot chai, so the lunch break post the scenic drive was thoroughly enjoyed.

We could not decide on a place, so we booked at the absolute last minute but luckily there was a last minute cancellation. So we booked Bryn LLys. An absolute delight of a place. On the way we stopped at Llangollenand the scene was set for the rest of the trip. I loved the walk along the stream and R and the kids loved a dog called Misty who enjoyed playing with them as much as she enjoyed time with them..

In the meanwhile I chatted with the 70 plus gentleman who owned the dog and it was a very thoughtful and fulfilling chat. We then made our way to the property, which I fell in love with at first sight. The owner had worked in a local attraction for 20 years and had wanted to own this place every time he cycled past it. Post retirement he had finally bought it and restored it with love. It was exactly and perfectly my kind of haven. Cosy, comfy, thoughtfully and charmingly decorated with rustic taste. The space was ample and reminded me of grandma’s home.

On day 2 we visited cwm Idwal’s bowl and did the walk around Idwal’s lake. We climbed the hill and what can I say..nature truly blesses us in all ways it can. The walk was as much a delight as the parking was a nightmare. The weather was not great, as there was wind hill despite the sun. But the beauty Of nature’s bounty with the hills, the babbling streams and the roaring waterfalls more than made up for it. 

We came home happy tired and had home made fare as was the case throughout our stay there.

The next day we first visited llanbaris lake. The railway was fully booked but the weather was fantastic. So we climbed the hill up to the quarry hospital and enjoyed the views from there. We then visited Swallow falls. It was yet another kind of beauty.

Did I mention all 3 nights we all stayed up till 2pm, chatting with the men on Remy Martins and the ladies on Merlot and cocktails and the children high on just fun?:)

The final day we packed up, said our fond good byes and made our way to Llandudno beach. I was knackered and stayed in the car, catching up on sleep and let the others have fun in the beach. Only around 4 pm did I step out for a short walk along the beach.

We came home after a stop over for a service station Burger King dinner and wrapped the summer up.There is just one birthday party next week, post which, secondary school, here we come! Fingers crossed!

Summer hols are here

The young one’s summer holidays have started and how..

She won two year end awards and a gold merit certificate for the term. She had received a book gift certificate. I had told her because I was happier at work, I would like to reward her with a kindle book for her support. So, now she passed on her gift certificate to me saying she would reward me for my support. :)

Our American neighbour very sweetly dropped a card for the little one along with some beautifully presented flowers from her garden. She had written a note about how she missed R during quarantine and the yellow flowers reminded her of R’s sunshiny nature..;). R was of course thrilled to see it once she came home.

As school has ended, the usual culprits decided to go to Dove dale. We had ordered food from our friend and started at noon. Though we had visited  5 years earlier with another family, this trip was very different and surprisingly even more fun. We had a great time, we climbed right to the top of the peaks, enjoyed a wonderful view in pleasant weather and had a nice time all round. We started back at 8pm but landed in S’s house. Had S’s usual sumptuous fare, chatted till 12 and left oh so happy.

12 hours of great fun and the best part was kuttima  saying..’thank you amma, I had such a great day!’...and that is what makes my day ;)

We have little A’s birthday get together to look forward to today especially as my R loves him to absolute bits.

Fingers crossed for another fun day for you my sweetest chellam..

Be nice to amma..

There is some ambiguity at work, mainly due to my boss and how she perceives me. So, I have been jumpy for the past two days. As usual I was muttering about these two not putting away clothes on time and the young one pipes up’Amma, I know you are worried about things at work and hence this bad behaviour is coming out (!).. I will not feel bad..it is ok’..so saying, she comes and gives me a massive hug:)

Later, we were all winding down to go to bed. She goes up to her dad and whispers in his ear. They had been planning for my birthday but now that was over and I also feel hurt that she is much more amenable to sharing secrets with her dad than me. I am solely the reason, as I do panic if something goes wrong for her and I do tend to be strict almost always.

After she left, I forced K to share what she said. Apparently she advised him to be kind to me and spend time with me as I am disturbed and need some support. K said, she was so sweet and genuine and matter of fact.

I am so proud of you kuttima. You are a good hearted sweet child. And I love you so much..

The big birthday

My big birthday in quarantine turned out to be the best ever! Before the C lockdown, the plan was for me and 3 other girls to go to Vienna for a 4 day trip. That got cancelled and I was under the impression I would have a quiet one with my K and R.

K had grouped three of our close family friends for a surprise party and day out instead. On my request, he cleaned the house for my birthday and it looked the neatest eve on my birthday eve, which was super! I received 40 roses with truffles the day before as a prelude to to my birthday.

We spent a great night together. The little one woke me up at 5:11 am (!) to be the first one to wish me.. messages started coming in and K was downstairs decorating the house with my favourite rose gold decorations. The day before, there was cake delivered representing everything I like like Books, travel, perfume, chocolates and nature walks. I loved the cake.

I also fit in to a dress I bought to receive an award in London, five years back. While ironing it 5 years back I scorched the petticoat inside so could not wear it. We then later got it sorted/ stitched over but I grew too fat to fit into it. Thanks to my lock down exercise regime, I wore it for the first time, on my birthday and it fit like a charm.

In the morning my K and R gave two letters each, K a laugh out loud one with all our favourite K drama phrases that I absolutely loved. The young one had very neatly written a cute poem.

We had a photo session and he said we would be visiting our friends to deliver cake and samosa. The young one kept pestering that she wanted to watch a movie with me, so  I would not look at the door. The families kindly parked streets away from the house to keep the surprise to the maximum.

I was beyond Happy to see my favourite faces. We had a lovely celebration and over and above the gifts , cards and flowers, two of them had very sweetly cooked my favourite dishes for me for lunch.

We all piled in to the cars, all 4 ladies in one car and had a fun ride to the huge park 40 minutes away.

The littlest one was going to turn 2 next year and we had great fun with him as well. He was a jolly little fella who had an infectious charm.

We had a sumptuous lunch in the park, (complete with snacks and juice and home cooked fare)and then walked to a canal. The kids had fun in the water, the dads settled down to play cards and us ladies went for a long tree canopied walk to a beautiful lake.

We spent the day there .Little A not getting cheated when we asked his mum to drop Paratha pieces in the crisp packet - he neatly threw those away and just ate the crisps, S being chased by a jersey cow, who then just smelt her handbag and let her go, little A chanting pop chicken till he fell asleep and the minute his mum brought pop chicken at KFC him immediately  waking up bright eyed and bushy tailed .. are just a sample of some of the hilarious moments that made the trip good, clean fun.

The weather veered close to playing spoilt sport but then decided to be kind after all..

After receiving birthday wishes all day long and the young one’s final good night wish and kiss, we all went to sleep very happy tired. Even so, the young one ensured she stayed up to write her Father’s Day card for her dear dad.

Next day, Father’s Day was celebrated with cards and t shirt and out of the blue,  we came to know that our good friends from India B and M had paid for lunch to be delivered to us, as a treat for my birthday as well as Father’s Day.

The simple thoughtfulness of the gesture that is so typical of them made me feel very blessed.

The best part also was everybody letting us know that our fitness regime was working in the lockdown and both K and I were looking fitter than the past few years.


All in all, life is beautiful in the simplest and kindest way possible.  

June 2020

Going to turn 40 soon..

In the lock down


Finished two professional courses and updated on LinkedIn
Reduced a stone in weight through diet and walk
In the process of muscle building through strength and resistance day 12;today
Incorporated healthy eating..month 3
Learnt Vedic astrology - would say 5 on a scale of 1 to 10
Learnt sight reading basics through teaching and helping the young one
Learnt Spanish basics , same as above
Learnt some korean and very little chinese
Shanti bhavan, Rubaroo Roshni, American factory and Tokyo trials : made an emotional and intellectual impact
Cooking better every day
Learning to count my blessings..
Cleaned two of the busiest rooms in the house

Deeply and quietly proud of the above as I know how I struggle with handling ambiguity.

Here is to hoping that my best years are yet to come..most definitely with K and R , who have been so loving and supportive as always.

C19 times..

We have been in lockdown since mid March. I am on government funded furlough starting this thamizh new year. Still blessed than many others and everyday I think ‘But for the grace of God...’

The young one has been having online classes since mid March. Having been exposed to news about the pandemic as well as talking to her friends who’s parents are doctors, surgeons etc and hence in the front line, something seems to have shifted inside this 10 year old child.

She is still the happy go lucky, dancing singing one..but.. once she gets up, without any prompting, she makes her bed, does 9:Surya namaskars, brushes, takes a shower, changes and comes down with any laundry to be brought downstairs, including ours.

When we are working, she sets out food on a tray and brings it to us by herself.  She loads the washing machine, unloads, loads the dryer, unloads, sorts, folds and outs them all away. (All accompanied by music and dancing of course!).

On Thursdays she soaks the ingredients for idli batter and clears all our plates and soaks them and helps us load the dish washer.

She also makes good omelettes.  All this is  sudden and unprompted which is the surprise. Usually she is so playful that the walls of our house echo with her name, the number of times I have to call her to do things!

Her teachers say she does very well with online classes even better than some older kids. Her singing teacher in fact said that she may be able to skip grade 3 and go straight to grade 4 next!

Most importantly with books and tele time, when I give her a deadline, she shuts them done by herself without any policing required.

Most of this, is I read her correctly, is because she is worried about our well being and this is how she thinks she is able to help us.

She is so sweet and kind that sometimes I feel all the wait for her was completely worth it.

Fingers crossed, we get to see the other side of this c19 safe and sound as a family.

Jan to March 2020

A first quarter of lists of twists and turns. Firstly, the young one got into her first grammar of choice. Our good friends who had by now moved back to India surprised her by couriering a kid’s Fitbit as her gift.

My very kind sister in law in the meanwhile couriered me a thermo tra x infrared belt for my back pain. We were also expecting a cheque couriered from our bank. All three used the same courier service so it was confusion galore. But thankfully everything ended well.

In another twist, we had planned to move to a different location to the school she had gotten the maximum scholarship ( that the school gave). So we attended the school special tea, paid the deposit etc. In the meanwhile, her current school that had already done and dusted scholarships etc, suddenly offered her a place in the scholarship programme.

She had performed well in her second term, endeared herself to her teachers with her originality in approach and was part of the debating club and was selected for chapel choir. Having considered all of the above and a surprise chat with her by the headmaster, she was given a scholarship..a late addition so to speak.

Her class teacher and the librarian had spoken to her head teacher about how she has an out of the box approach to most things and always has original ideas. Once they had asked for a creative advertisement for a chocolate they were supposed to make. While all the kids made really good posters and slogans, she enacted a video ad with music and dialogues and a jingle:)

So, she received scholarship in a category they never had ...original personality.

Now we were in a soup. We spoke to various parents and they all said, while the other school was really good, this one was equally good and given that she was part of the scholarship programme there was no real reason for us to move.

So we withdrew our other place, got our deposit refunded and decided to stay here. ( Final decision before end of April..but unless finances changed drastically, this would be our choice)

She also made a science project, that did not win ( as the technical model was very simple and mostly done by her dad) but was identified and recognised for its originality.(The idea, conceptualisation, branding were all her)
She made a video presentation for the same as well. I must say it was very well done.

In all, a very interesting time especially with this pandemic threatening to take over all our lives. Fingers crossed.








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Andaman 2019

With 6 offers including 2 substantial scholarships and one grammar placement, we all needed a well earned big break. Given that it was December and time to meet R and K the plan was to go to India and from there a  9 day trip to Andaman.

I had been to Andaman on a school trip when I was 15 years old and thoroughly enjoyed it, so was looking forward to it.

On the day we were to leave, K and I were both busy with work till noon.We picked R from school and had a tiring 3 hour bus ride to London Heath*ow.

The flight to Chennai via Dubai was tiring but uneventful except for one thing. K wanted to buy a gift for his parents. I persuaded him to buy gold but when he got it, I was so jealous that I went and bought a small gold ring just so  I won’t resent his purchase. Not one of my finest moments, let’s just say.

We landed in humid Chennai around 8 pm and after a long wait for our prepaid taxi, finally reached C’s home around 10.30 pm. R and K were wide awake waiting for our R and the kids had a great time catching up. K and I had a blood test home visit the next day, so we chatted for a bit and went to sleep. The kids slept together chatting away most of the night as R had caught up on her sleep in the flight.

The next day, soon after the blood test and a quick breakfast, C and I left for Sunda*i silks in T nagar to buy Pattu pavadai for Raksha for next Diwali. The idea was to buy these clothes and give them to the tailor so they would be ready when we came back from holiday. But ultimately that did not work out as the tailor who was supposed to visit us at 7 pm that day, did not turn up.

C and I had a lovely time shopping and window shopping at Nalli , Sundari silks and Max. Since it was a Sunday and we started early, the crowds and traffic were not so bad.

The kids meanwhile had a great time playing, travelling in a scooter, feeding and stroking cows etc.

It was another late night as we had to pack for our 5 am flight to port Blair the next day.

The kids woke up without any prompting and we made it to the airport in good time. Unfortunately the air India security check was quite tedious and the jumping of queues, pushing in etc did not help.The flight was ok and we landed in port Blair 25 minutes ahead of schedule, around 6.30.It turned out to be most unfortunate as the Green ocean cruise to Havelock island did not leave till 12. We had to check in at 11 so we could not visit chidiyatapu or the zoo. The kids played in the garden for a bit as we were not allowed to check in or wait in the building till 9 am.

At 9 am we finally went in. The rest rooms were an absolute night mare, the building was dirty, the chairs were torn and the smell was awful. We had a nightmarish  another 2 hours , though the kids were real troopers and tried their best to make the best of the situation, playing games, reading the kindle etc.

When it was time to board the ferry, the lining up was a mad rush and a fight broke out between two men. The local guards were called and  finally there was a proper line up.

We finally boarded the Royal class but it was anything but Royal. A highly stupid and inappropriate movie was played. The toilets were once again a night mare. The ship was smooth sailing though and we made it to havelock in two hours.

After disembarking and taking our luggage , we walked through the crowded quay where a rep from Baref**t  Have*lock was waiting  for us.

We took the cabs to Barefoot and finally our nightmarish travel was done. We relaxed in the restaurant for bit and then got some grub for our hungry tummies. We had nothing since the meal in the flight at around 6 am and it was nearly 3 pm now.

Post lunch, we went in to out tented ac adjacent cottages and settled down. After a quick shower, we went to check out the private beach. It was quite dark as the sun set here around 4.30 pm and sun rise was around 3.45.

The North Star was burning bright. The kids were playing with the torches given to light our path. After a few minutes , I went to the spa, got myself spruced up and relaxed.

Came back to the tent, slept soundly and woke up promptly for the bird watching session at 5pm.

And what a session it turned out to be. I never figured myself to be patient enough as an Ornithologist to spot birds and enjoy doing it. Initially I only enjoyed the walk through the thick forest area by the beach and found it difficult to spot the birds through my binoculars. However, as we spotted more and more orange, shiny green, blue green  and other  colourful feathers , quirky tails , beaks of all sizes and flamboyant crowns , I caught the bug and really enjoyed it.

R enjoyed spotting hermit crabs and ghost crabs as they scuttled about carrying shells. We saw the mud fish that had lungs and gills that would, if it found itself outside water , it would jump its way back in to the water by itself.

While we were enjoying the birds and the crabs by the beach, suddenly, there was a flash of silver and it turned out it was a silver fish swimming and jumping towards the beach from the sea. It was the most fascinating sight I had ever seen!

R was hungry by now and we made our way back to the restaurant through the forest. The forest was full of rich vegetation, tall tees, rich foliage, Mohua fruits ( something like wood apple) and pandana cactus leaves.

There was an in-house consultant , a wild life conservationist from Mumbai called Nar*man. He had interesting tidbits about everything we saw and overall it was a lovely experience. It cost INR1000 and was totally worth it.

The next day we also had N bring a green snake to the hotel for all the guests to touch and interact. I did not but the kids did and had a great time.

We spent a total 4 days at Barefoot. We had a trek to elephant beach and it was one of the best treks ever. Havelock hotel in itself is like  an untamed jungle and the lush greenery , golden beach and clear water , not to mention absolute privacy, is a fantastic lot. The trek was through a hilly, lush with tall trees, thick mangroves and shady pathways with rough roots underfoot. We all thoroughly enjoyed it and the acqua blue beach at the end of it was  a sight for sore eyes. But the beach was absolutely teeming and as with the rest of Andaman hygiene was a huge issue. Almost everybody was using gutka and we all rebelled against using snorkelling equipments already used by gutka filled mouths and ultimately we neither snorkelled nor scuba dived. We simply rested, had some tender coconut and made our way back.

C, I , K and the kids went swimming in the crystal clear Radhanagar beach. It was our best swim ever. We had a solid 4 hour swim, going quite deep in to the shallow waters, playing catch, watching the fishes, letting the waves massage our backs, jumping into the waves and swimming to our heart’s content. The famous sunset was a sight to behold and the golden sands were a good refuge when we wanted a rest.

Then the night mare began. R had not bothered to hydrate herself during the trek and just that morning had filled herself with cheese that was not of the best quality. She started vomiting and for the next 48 hours could not keep any food down. She had diarrhoea too. I once caught her vomit in my hand as we were inC’s room and K washed her diarrhoea stained clothes, so we caught the bug too. K had high fever and I vomited our wedding anniversary dinner and dessert. :(

But C as usual was positive throughout, insisted that we take it in our stride, helped us manage her liquid intake and ensured that R and K gave her company. So, we pulled through somehow with walks through the jungle and gentle rests at the reception cottage and spending time in C’s wooden cottage which was the best int he property. ( V , C’s husband was ultra sensitive and the pre was mould in their tent, so they were shifted to this cottage)

What we did not realise was that the best of our visit was over. We stayed for 2 days at Neil island and 2 days at Portblair. While makkruzz was a much better ship than Green Ocean and the boat trips were pleasing, the unorganised, night marish waiting with the kids and the luggage in the absolutely burning sun and the chaotic in unboarding and long walk on the bridge was not.

The seashell property on Neil island was again full of beautiful gardens and the swing near the beach h behind helped us three recover double time. The restaurant was a green house ( glass walls all around) with lush gardens visible  outside the walls and hence a good place to relax. But, the food was not of good quality and hygiene in the bharatpur beach with everybody spitting, dogs and the untidy glass bottomed boats and life jackets did not let us enjoy the beautiful corals and marine life below. The punishing sun did not help either.

We also made it to Lakshmanpur Beach to see the coral natural bridge and take pictures in front of the aqua marine water that had receded. The kids had a gala time spotting fishes and hermit crabs amongst the corals that were visible in low tide.

We climbed our way back up and returned to the hotel for lunch.

With the sun being harsher than I imagined, C and I took to the local market to buy a dress for me and a frock for R, as what we had packed was not adequate, given the weather.

We then landed in Port Blair which unfortunately for us, turned to be the worst of the lot. The outdoor AC was maddeningly loud right next to our door in the seashell property and the manage, though he apologised profusely could only move us to another room, the next day. I returned the food ordered u;touched as it was so oily and looked clearly unhealthy. 

Breakfast was an ok affair and the hotel was too small for the huge number of guests. We visited the cellular jail and the disrespect and general attitude of the teeming crowd was tasteless. The prisons and the chairs were the jailers issued commands to punish the freedom fighters were mocked at and flippantly pictured with inappropriate poses by many tourists. The history of the place was so sad but the current attitude made it more depressing.

We. visited the beach but did not even get down as it was too crowded despite a crocodile having been spotted only earlier.

The next day we went to the market to buy two more frocks for R and went on another long wait for the ferry to Ross Island. This trip was mildly better as the golf tour of the island was pleasant and we just spent the next 4 hours spotting peacocks, deers and rabbits, listening to songs from my Deez* r account offline.

The ferry and flight back early next morning was ok as we knew what to expect. But we definitely should have gone to Thailand as initially planned and would advise our friends to may be visit havelock Radhanagar beach for a day but that is it. Very difficult with kids, though to their credit the three kids complained very little and found ways to enjoy even when the going was tough.

The icy spicy restaurant was good and the qu*a spa’s Balinese massage did relieve me of my back pain for atleast a week or so.

I had had a manicure and pedicure at Havelock on the first day and that was ok as well.

It was a relief to reach Chennai and honestly the weather turned out to be quite pleasant and in fact there was a mild drizzle when we landed.

India trip December 2019

Just back from a fantastic and one of our very best vacations - India 2019. Unlike last time, cannot remember a day by day account of the 19 days but shall record a general post for memories sake.

Just before starting, kuttimma won Gold in a badminton county tournament and finished gold level in swimming too. But, despite all the high scholarships, her academic record this term was not good enough for me. She insisted this term she wanted to relax after the huge pressures of last year, so I reluctantly let it go.

The reason this vacation turned out to be one of the best is because of the love  and care that C showered on Raksha and I. C has been a close friend for quite a while now but the selfless love she imparts is very precious to me. She is possibly the same with anybody but for me, who has not had a maternal house to go to since 2008, her home, when I was pregnant, as well as when I visited her this time was more loving, caring and emotionally nourishing than any other home has ever been for me.

She would not let me partake in cooking or cleaning other than the bare minimum, she would cook all of R’s favourite dishes, she would enjoy dressing her up in her own accessories, she would give me her fantastic coffee on waking up and listen to me and counsel me on all my worries. She is only 2 years older than me but I feel so cared for when I spend time with her, even if it is only going shopping with her. She would not allow me to spend unnecessarily and would gently chide R when she is off on one of her impulsive runs.

Her sons K and R are such different personalities, but both so loving and fun. R spent all 19 days completely and absolutely with them, enjoying, fighting, making up and generally having a blast.

The other good thing that happened was that K’s parents came over to Chennai and we visited them at the West*n Marrio*tt. They stayed at the Royal Meri**dien . Their service was rubbish whereas ours was fantastic. The kids and C and I stayed there was 3 days and the kids had a fantastic time  running around and swimming in the hotel pool and enjoying the humungous and scrumptious breakfast. K’s parents had a great time with R and I met them briefly too. C’s  presence helped me manage my minor irritations.

R and C’s kids R and K also visited K’s Chennai home where he grew up and once again had a great time with her grand parents, cousin who was busy with her 12th boards and aunt. I was so glad R met her cousin and had a great time. The grand parents were very loving towards R, were very impressed by her swimming and she loved her silver bracelet and earring from her cousin and maroon beaded gold dollar chain from her grandma.

R also gifted a gold chain to her Grandpa and a pure silk Saree to her grandma. She also gave cash to her cousin for her to spend as she saw fit.

Added to the above, K and I visited the Kalahasti temple , the day we returned from the Andaman. The driver was very professional, ( though car drives in India have gotten to be an absolute night mare and lives seem to escape within a hair’s breadth!) the temple has been fitted with fans and neat roofs, so it was quite cool unlike the burning hot visits I have had there before. We had a reasonably good Dharshan and then we visited K’s periamma. To see her and his nephew and family pamper K made me feel proudand happy. K was very loving to them as well. They spoke to R over the phone on video call and really missed her. However R was with R and K and also, we did not want her on the perilous drive. We had a lovely home cooked meal there and left happy.

We also went shopping in T nagar and after much search found everything we wanted. Kumar*n silks turned out to be the place where we got what we wanted.  It this shopping trip was an experience in itself. We spent some time shopping in Phoen*ix mall as well and that was a totally different kind of experience.

Another good thing that happened was C found a good tailor for me, who converted 3 of my old silk sarees that I was going to throw away , into 3 silk gowns for me and one silk gown for Raksha at a very reasonable rate. Another jackpot of the trip.

I also went with K to Avat*na at ITC Gra*d Ch*la for a fantastic dinner. We had the Bela menu and it was absolutely fantastic. We loved the size and very tamil names and decor of the hotel and the restaurant staff were especially nice. The meal, as promised was an experience in itself and the flavours really subtle but superb. K said the non veg was the best he ever had. As it was our belated anniversary celebration, they also made us a special dessert and asked us to guess the flavours - filter coffee, idly, jaggery and sesame! We could have never guessed! .

Another dinner we had after our T nagar shopping was at Malg*di in Saverr*. The food was not to my taste except for the divine elaneer payasam. But K took me there having already been there the day before for his college friends’ meet and loved the chappala Pulusu. I loved the village decor and the live flute rendition of ilayaraja songs, so all in all a pleasant evening. R as usual was with her friends at C’s place , having a gala time.

C’s top floor flat has a fantastic view of the beach several temples etc and always has a pleasant wind blowing through the house. Also, the play area in the grounds below is small but neat and R had a wonderful time making new friends and playing there. When K and I were in Kalahasthi,   Also took R and the kids to the PC (Pinna*le Cre*st, their apartment block) swimming pool  and the kids greatly enjoyed.

C cooked R’s favourite Aloo paratha, vegetable noodles, chappati and Channa etc and under C’s strict supervision, R had more food than she ever did manage under mine.

One morning, R, K and I as a family also visited a near by 1000 year old Srinivasa perumal temple (Chemman*ery) to give thanks to the year and request guidance to choose the right senior school for R.

While in Marri**ott, C and I and the kids also visited the nanganallur Anjaney**r temple. It was wonderful to pray and simply be there. K could not join us as he had a health check up nearby.

The last day, we met the year 1 college girl that both families were helping educate. We had a good time with the girl and her mum while also sharing some life lessons. We hooked her up with another girl who was smart and ambitious and could guide her. Her mum left happy.

We returned in emirates BC as we both had to work the next day. This time around, it was way way better than last time and we thoroughly enjoyed it. The lounge at Chennai was pleasant and had good Indian fare. The flight was good, food was good and service pleasant enough. But Dubai to L was at another level. The lounge was super cool, the shower facilities fantastic ( as it was new year’s day, we all showered and changed), food range and quality were awesome.

The flight as well was very comfortable, food fantastic and service excellent.

I am afraid in my experience I can see that the more mixed the crew is, the more pleasant the service.

I also bought for myself the most expensive piece of jewellery I have ever worn. It may not be so for the majority of other women but usually I have simple tastes and shy away from even basic jewellery. This time around, for some reason, I indulged myself. Though I don’t see myself wearing it too often, I did love looking at it.

From LH we travelled home..the final drive provided by the airlines was a very good quality car. I had rested very well in my flight home. But still the last 2.30 hours were quite a strain on my legs for some reason.

We reached home and in the next half hour, a very good friend of ours M was at our door as his wife had sent food for the night, next morning, bread, milk and snacks for us. I was gobsmacked. This is another couple that is so giving without any expectations, just because it is their nature to be so thoughtful.

With both C and this couple, I heartily wish the universe fulfils all their wishes as I can honestly and genuinely say my mental health has been better and my heart much more happier because of their actions. C especially has made a great difference to my life just by being so kind and loving. She is not at all emotional and does not even hug easily. But she just briskly does things that are so kind. I am truly blessed .

What I have not mentioned in all of the above is our Andaman trip with its many disasters, a separate post on the same next...

Letters to my young lady 11

Patumma, ammu

Where do I start. You wrote some big exams in 2019 Sep/ Oct. On the 4 th Oct you received big result 1 for your grammar school. Very happy. Good enough to qualify in the above average range. First academic scholarship interview letter on 10 th Oct. 2nd Academic scholarship interview letter on 16th Oct. On 19th Oct, second grammar result. Once again, well above average.

We know you are definitely not in the genius category. You are that smart kid who works relentlessly to produce results while being always upbeat! To that teacher who said ‘ She is really good in English and maths is fine but NVR will not get her in to grammar’ Ma’am you simply do not know children ,especially not my daughter. She does not understand ‘can’t’. Another thing she does not know is how to hold a grudge. She still likes you. But sorry, I don’t.

You did not like her because she would politely but firmly question you when you calculated her marks percentage wrong. She also challenged you when you tried to bully her.

You thought being the tiniest and youngest, she should defer to all older kids and adults. She, rightly thought otherwise.

Well, my puny one is gigantic in her heart. We see her as Wonder Woman and so does she. How you saw her was solely your problem, not hers.

All of the above pattumma, parallelly  you qualified for the county in badminton , achieved Lamda grade 2, bharartnatham grade 2, singing grade 3, Kumon E ( you started Kumon late July and we did not attend in October) and swimming silver. And the joy of life is still bubbling inside you.

The head teacher of KH was very impressed with your interview and shook Daddy’s hand and said how proud we must be of you.

You had happily suggested additional books for their school library and how to make their learning environment more fun. He particularly identified how you were clearly a child with a child’s perspective and belief in making everything happier and nicer for children.

You are never that top student , top player, top musician. But you are above average at a lot of things. 

And being cheeky and happy , no matter what, well, in my head you are the top of the top in that!

No matter who says you can’t ( including me) , hopefully you would look back at this time and say, ‘ Well , people have always been telling me that, poor sods’ and March your happy march of life blithely proving us all wrong...

Now we know why we waited for you for so long chelame..

Good things take time..;)

Love you loads

Amma

Trip to Algarve continued...

The next day we rushed through breakfast and set off to zoo marine park. To her delight she received a call from our friends and their little ones in Chennai to wish her happy birthday in advance!

On reaching zoo marine, we were not disappointed. For such a crowded place, the people were polite, the toilets and shower rooms were clean and food was more reasonably priced than even outside!

The young one went for her Dolphin emotions experience where she made the dolphin dance, she swam on top of one and kissed one and had a whale of a time. There were only 5 to a group and it was very well organised though expensive.

A gentleman proposed to his girlfriend by using a dolphin to give her the ring.so that was sweet as well..

We then stood in a queue for half an hour only to dodger we were standing for the wrong ride. But we still enjoyed the gentle Jurassic ride and went for the pirate shoes, the dolphin show ( though we have seen the Florida one, the Barcelona one, the Dubai one  etc this one was still ballet like  and mermaid dance like and different) the sharks and sea anemones and water dragons etc. Dad and daughter then spent some time on the artificial wave beach..we still were not done with the dolphins and went for yet another little dolphin 4d show. We had crepes and orange juice and then towards the fab end, we went back to the sea lions and the young one raced with them very cutely.. calling out from this side of the glass fence every time they roared, ‘ No, no, don’t complain..I won this one fair and square!’  ;)

We then went to a Michelin starred restaurant as K wanted to try the fish there and the wine. We were happy tired and crashed in the hotel once back.

The next day was the big 2 digit birthday so the young one woke us all up at 3.40 a, suddenly having woken up with the excitement of having turned 10! Lots of fun and blessings later , time to pack, have breakfast and leave. She told everybody and anybody who would listen..I am a big girl and have turned 10 today!

The phone was buZing from the morning with wishes for her from everybody!

Back home to a surprisingly boiling hot  city, noodles and subway for lunch for the happy birthday babe, cake, a little prep for the mock the next day and off to sleep!

PS

The young one loves Calvin and Hobbes. So, when 2 years back,her friends R and K gifted her a lioness soft toy in Singapore, she immediately named her lily rose and treats her exactly like Calvin treats Hobbes. She has conversations with lily rose, takes her cycling, treats her kindly, takes her to bed etc.

At Algarve, lily rose got dunked in the sea and buried in the sand and sadly her eye came off. Typically, ( very practical and happy go lucky) the young one said, never mind, I am always going to love her and let’s just get another friend for my double digit ages!

But K was not going to spring for yet another soft toy, so he super glued the eye back once we were back home. So now, Lily rose is back by the young one’s side, the beach dunk and burial merrily forgiven;)

Trip to Algarve

For the young lady’s 10th birthday we went on a 4 day trip to Algarve, Portugal. We love Portugal and its people so much that this is our third trip to the country. We are seriously thinking of buying a property there as we are yet to see a more friendly, respectful and secure people anywhere else. And we have been to and lived in a few countries, to say the least.

On day one, we reached the 3 h b fales@ia hotel in Olhas d agua. It was an 8 am flight so we reached at 11. Our conscientious young one finished her Kumon on the flight. So, as soon as we landed, it was straight to the pool. The hotel was positioned on a cliff over looking the sea, so the view was quiet good. The weather, as expected was boiling hot in the high 20s. After the pool,  some pizza from the snack bar and changing in our spacious and clean room, we tried walking down the steps to the beach. However it was pretty late by then and people were coming back, so we decided to just take a rain check.

Though we went for the standard room, it was spacious and pleasant. The sea facing rooms were not refurbished and those blocks did not have a lift so it all worked out good.

K had fever the previous few days, but still had been at work..I had been running around sorting the new uniform and my Diwali stitching and the young one had badminton camp for the previous two days, where she played for 4 hours each so, we were all knackered.

Also, with a lot of effort from all of us, the young one had made giant leaps in her scores in the k.  Sol last mock test and the inspire mocks 7, 8 and 9 , so we were in a well deserved rest phase ;)

We went in to town to have dinner at  taste of Punjab, where the food was tasteful enough. 

After a restful sleep, The next day we had breakfast overlooking the cliff. We love the food in Portugal usually, but the standard here was  not as good as Madeira or Lisbon but still higher than any other country’s Hotel. The fruits especially were of a very high quality. But no variety of nuts for my porridge or hash browns for the little one.

After taking a few snaps, we went to the beach, played a bit and then we set for our dolphin watch to Albufeira..  we were supposed to go horse riding but that didn’t work out. Though the boat trip was pleasant enough and we saw the cathedral caves and the secret caves formed by rocks that were more than 20 million years old and we loved the submarine and Sphinx rock formations, we could not spot a single dolphin.

We had a quick lunch nearby and also lots of pastries at the famous cafe creek cafeteria ( nothing extraordinary but reasonable enough)and made our way back to the hotel. Dad and daughter went for a swim, I read my Good earth yet again and then went down to join them for the walk to the beach. I took my usual morning my walks in the beach while they rested and played in the waves.

They went for Thai dinner while I had the remains of their pizza from the pool and read my book.

Letters to my young lady 10

Dear Kannamma

You are at the grand old age of 10! You are so proud of this that you mentioned this to all whom you met at the restaurant and airport on our trip to Algarve.

 Though you achieved a distinction in bharathnatyam grade 1, singing grade 2, lamda grade  2, bikeability, swimming silver  and badminton county selection for under 12s this year and piano grade 1 ( the year before last) is already in your kitty..we have taken stock and decided that you would like some other instrument and not piano, bharatnatyam is not what you want and acting lessons and stage coach is what you would like to go for this year. While continuing singing, lambda, badminton and swimming.

You have worked really hard for your eleven plus this year, only to gauge your standard as we already passed the exam to the school we want to go. In maths , you have found a way to tackle time pressure. You now choose only those sums that you know you can do relatively fast and you get them all right. That way despite leaving out one or two sums, you are still scoring really high! Well done Kannamma.

This is typical you. Not getting bogged down by problems but figuring out a way that does not require you to compromise your basic nature. Resilience, perseverance and an intense joy in life are still your core characteristics.

Love you to the moon and back pattu. May each year of your life be happier and filled with more joy and kindness and love than the year before!

Bless you my bundle of joy!

Love
Amma

15th July 2019

An important day for the young one. She got through the selections for the county badminton squad for under 12s. As usual, jumping, smiling and skipping..with not a single aggressive or seemingly ambitious bone in her body!

Let’s see where this takes us Kannamma..

Post birthday break

As part of the birthday celebration, my friend D and I planned to take off to a spa break for a night away from the mad crowds that our families were ;)

We took off around 4 pm on the Friday and it was a fun  30 minute drive of giggles and laughter to New?.?Hall hotel and spa. It was a 12th century castle with a moat and wonderful woods and lakes around. There was an old and charming church in the premises as well..

We checked in and immediately took off to explore the woods. The weather was warm with an occasional cool breeze.After a lovely long walk, we changed to our swim suits and visited the sap. It was a small and cosy set up with a swimming pool, sauna and staeam room. We had the pool all to ourselves.. we swam for around 45 minutes and checked out the steam room a bit and went to shower and change for dinner.

Went down to the old and charming dining area..we were given sample wines to try before ordering get and to our shame that in itself made us tipsy! We ordered the area’s famous driftwood cheese, polenta cake for me as main, sea bass for D, and  for dessert we had dark chocolate parfait. While the food was different, adequately tasteful and service warm, the cost was a bit too high for the quality delivered. But we had a great time chatting and laughing and came back to our room around 11 pm.

We changed to our night clothes and as it usually happens with all of my friends, chatted well in to the night . We should have fallen asLet only around 2 or 3. A’s was my habit, I was promptly up at 6.45.

Showered , changed and went down for a really sumptuous English breakfast, fruits, pastries rounding it off with fresh waffles with maple syrup. We once again visited the well loved grounds, (especially since it was such a glorious morning with the sun shining brilliantly)took some pictures and checked out at 12 with the intention to come back around 4pm for the luxury facial that was part of the deal.

In the meanwhile, D had caught a really bad case of hay fever. So we we went to the pharmacy for tablets and eye drops . We ditched the idea of visiting Kingsbury grounds and instead opted for the local mall. We went window shopping, D purchased some gifts, we had some milk shake and macaroons for lunch and covered topics we had not yet managed like movies, books, travel etc. Around 4 we went back to the grounds , enjoyed the scenery a bit more, read our books and wen tin for the facials at 5.

It was genuinely one of the most relaxing facials we had ever had. We gave the feedback to the young ladies, took a picture of our rare rlaxed faces and smiles and took off home.

All in all, a small, sweet and overall fantastic break.

Out of the mouths of babes..

It being my birthday..we had all gone to Ask ? Italian for lunch. K keeps quizzing the young one on the value/ cost of each item so she understands the relative worth of goods and services. At the end of today’s quiz..the young one pipes up ‘What would be my value?’

I started thinking, as I wanted to tell her how precious she was at the same time..how difficult we find it to handle her cool, unemotional naughtiness and cheekiness. While I am thinking how to frame the answer..she again quickly pipes up cheekily ‘ Please make sure you say a value more than 50 pounds, so you do not hurt my feelings ok?’

You had to be there to see her expression and tone of voice..

K and I almost died laughing:)

Easter 2019 - days 4 and 5

Day 3 dawned bright and sunny and the plan for the day was to visit the heads of Ayr farm park.  We went there around 10 am and the kids had a blast for the rest of the day. The young one particularly enjoyed feeding a pony called Merry Legs. She would go to the open trampoline, visit the other animals, go on the slide etc but always check on merry legs every now and then and feed her from the palm of her hand.

The weather was unbelievable for scotland especially for easter. We then went to the nearby Ayr beach where the young one got messy building sand castles and spotting washed up Jelly fish while K and I took our favourite long walk along the beach.

We had determined that these 4 days were a complete holiday for the young one  - with no studies and no food restrictions and most importantly no telling-offs from mum. She had a complete blast but hand on heart I could say that she was very sensible and though she opted for junk, she did not go overboard. She was extremely polite to our hosts, cleared her plates after she ate, cleaned the sink and tub after her brush and bath, thanked them when warranted and was sweetly well behaved with no prompts from either of us.

What was even more endearing was how she teased the shy little boy out, gently coaxing him to open up and devising games that he would enjoy as well. Being 5 years older, she could have easily bullied him ( as most older kids do with her) but she was gentle, sweet and friendly throughout. She did not 'mother' him but was a good and caring older friend. I was super proud of her and so was her dad.

We went to Akbar's for dinner and it was a refreshingly good experience after our previous night's debacle.

Our host P had to leave for work the next morning, so we said our good byes and left the next day. Once again we stopped at the Gretna green services for some refreshments and then made our way to the Lake district. The weather was so glorious, that we wanted to make the most of it.

Once again, we had been to Beatrix Potter land a while back, but we loved it so we visited the lake again. I did not want the ferry but preferred to walk around the lake. The young one gaily fed the ducks , we had our walk, enjoyed the beauty of the blooming trees, the green grass and the rolling hills, chit chatted our way around the lake and drove back home knackered and ready to fall into bed around 9 pm.

All in all, a wonderful holiday ( the cheapest we had ever had but one of  the best :) and another one notched up to keep us warm and light on cold and dark days :)

Easter 2019 Days 1,2 and 3

Unlike the last 10 easters that we have been here.. this easter was a bright and sunshiny one and hence the best of them all :). Though our friends had all planned for Tenerife, we chose the path less taken this easter and planned to visit JK Rowling's original haunts at Edinburgh. One of our friends kindly invited us to stay with them at their house, so the matter was settled.

On the Thursday, the young one finished her mock test review and her badminton class and swimming session at DL. She has already finished her bronze level of swimming and loves to swim just like that any chance she gets. Once in the water, it takes  atleast an hour if not more before I can successfully coax her out.

She was excited since her friend D was visiting her from Shropshire. Unfortunately, D's dad was a medical director and had some urgent issue to attend to and could not leave till 6 pm. While the restless young one was trying to engage herself otherwise, D and her family came walking in, having luckily zipped through the non peak traffic window for easter.

And what a evening it was! We grownups had a fun time chatting and laughing and eating dinner and sipping our drinks till 2 am in the morning. The next day, D's dad mentioned how it had been a long time since they had laughed so much and how the tension of the meeting had drained away from him over the course of the evening. We felt something similar as well.

The young ones completely sorted themselves out, despite meeting after almost a year. I went up to sleep at 2 am and could still hear them giggling and chatting till 3 am!

On day 2 all of us woke up around 9 am, had a leisurely breakfast of brioche bread and egg for the adults and nutella, brioche bread and cold chocolate milk for the kids. D and family left around 2 pm. We had our stuff packed and ready, so we cleaned up the house, locked up and left around 3 pm for our  drive of 4.30 hours to Glasgow. The weather was glorious, the young one needed her sleep, so she stretched out at the back with her pillows .. while K and I chatted, listened to music and enjoyed the drive.

We stopped at Gretna Green for a comfort break and then reached glasgow around 8.30 pm. The lady of the house, H was 8 months pregnant and the little boy was around 5 years old. Our young one, immediately struck a friendship and started playing with him while we had dinner and quickly went to bed.

On day 3, we had a quick breakfast and let H relax while the rest of us drove from Glasgow to Edinburgh. We had some lovely french toast, mac and cheese and milkshakes at Mimi's cafe at Edinburgh, took some snaps around Victoria street that was the inspiration for Diagon alley and then visited Edinburgh castle.

We had been there when the young one was around 3 and I fell in love with St Margaret's chapel and the stained glass painting of Queen Margaret there. So I took the young one to see the same, we then visited the crown jewels, the cannons etc and also the boy wizard shop on the way down.  We had some icecream and the kids played around for a bit.

On the way down we discovered we have lost our shuttle tickets..rare for K as he is usually diligent with stuff like this. We walked down instead and visited the Elephant house where JK Rowling wrote her HP drafts. The young one was the first to spot it and she seemed quite inspired by the whole visit. We then made our way to Victoria street- the museum context store, took some pics in front of trhe chamber of secrets mirror and the hogwarts school desk, bought a souvenir pen for the young one and walked further down the road to anothermerchandise shop and a disney store to buy a batman doll for the little boy who had been patiently doing the HP franchise tour for the sake of our young one.

Throughout the trip, the young one used this pen to write int he notebook gifted to her by D. She was spinning a story of mermaids under the sea..

We then visited Greyfriar's Kirk cemetry and managed to spot the names McGonagall, Tom Riddle and Helen.

We managed to then visit the porto bello beach for the little boy and given the weather was glorious , we had a good time at the sandy beach.

Drove back home, changed out of our sandy clothes and both families went to to Rishi's for dinner. A worse experience in dining we had never had. The food was bad, delayed and the service confused. The kids nodded off even before we could make our way back. We chatted a bit and went to bed happy and tired.

..To be continued

Letters to my young one..9

Chellamma

You know what has been going on for the past few days.. You have worked so hard, harder than anybody else we know ( because they say so and you gave up reading, tele time, free time etc and I, who  has always taken pride in working hard, am amazed at the kind of work ethic and stamina you exhibit). You come back from school, read a bit for pleasure/ go on your bike for some time if it is sunny  and sit straight after on maths, every single day. You work for 4 hours straight with your friends on a weekend  , come home and sit straight after, working at Maths again for 3 hours. The maths concepts are being taught at an exponential speed and you work hard at it because you like to understand the concept , explain to daddy and then do your sums. You do not like to rush, especially when it comes to Maths.

All this effort, despite knowing that you have already got in to a school , so there is no desperate drive for it.

You simply want to do it.

At class, you help your friends understand these concepts because you are so clear about them.When discussing something in real life, like time for a flight or change to be given or percentages achieved you clearly explain these to us and give us the answers.

However, your scores, though above average  , are not at the top of the class. You know the concepts earlier, you know them well but when it comes to timed tests, your mistakes become inevitable.  Children who have learnt from you, who have made half the effort as you have, score better than you.

It breaks my heart to see that all your effort means only half the result. But, that is silly, ordinary, insecure me. You my darling, never let the smile leave your face. You are proud of the bits you got right, you want us to help you avoid mistakes and with that, you are done and dusted. You pat yourself on the back and give yourself a half-an-hour bike ride as a reward for all your hard work :)

Not once, not even once are you jealous of your friends or bitter about your results.

And that gorgeous smile and silly jokes and sunshiny confidence - none of these miss a beat!

Because, in your head,  tomorrow is always going to be better and you are simply going to try again.

Hats off!

You tell me often that I inspire you. Kannamma, let me tell you, I have been inspired by many people in the journey of my life, but none more than you. I live with you, I see you, I made you , I scold you, I love you and yet... I sit amazed by your extraordinary approach to life.

Surely no credit to me or your daddy. We teach you little things, you take them and make it something much more than what we give.

Some day sweetheart, all these seeds will flower and bloom and that day - what a garden you are going to have. I will learn from you and wait patiently for that day and mend my broken heart with your smile.

Love you da thangame!
Amma

The imperfect crime

So, one of my close friends is from Gujarat and she had cooked a bitter but very healthy spinach almond cake that is supposedly good for kids. She had given some for us. I came home and warned the cheeky one that it was a bitter Indian cake but I would really be happy if she ate it.

Astonishingly surprisingly she said ‘ fine amma’ and took it to her room upstairs. I did hear a small thump but I though it was the birds on the roof or some such thing..The empty plate came down after a few minutes and all was well.

Two days later, K happens to look up while sitting in the conservatory and a small shape suspiciously resembling the spinach cake could be seen clearly on the conservatory frosted glass roof.

He takes the CM aside and asks her twice..’ Did you really eat the cake?’  Wide and innocent puppy eyes take centre stage and a vigorous defence of her righteous self ensues....till the shape on the roof is pointed out!

So, the CM had very stealthily and with great planning, carried the cake upstairs, tasted a small bite, concluded eating the cake was too great a sacrifice for a mere 9 year old , taken an executive decision and thrown it out of the bedroom window not realising that it falls right on the conservatory roof, the dining room adjacent to which is where we all spend most of our time in!

Though lots of lecturing on the importance of being truthful and not cheating happened, K and I can’t stop laughing (carefully only when the CM is not around) at the sheer childish innocence that runs through all of her actions and thoughts..even when it is in the planning of a petty crime!